Updates

Okay, well, it's been a really interesting month so far. My toe/foot is still very, very painful. I can be up and around for about 20 minutes before I MUST sit, though, so things are starting to get done again.

Hubby went to the doctor to get refills on all his prescriptions. Without insurance, just walking into the doctor's office cost $120. He's down to four Rxs now, and thankfully, the expensive one has gone generic, so instead of $500, it's "only" $300. Yowza. We can't even afford to pick them up, so I have no idea how he is going to get through the next 1o days of no sleep.

Several other unusual payments have come due this month, and with 13 days left in the month, our bank balance zeroed out. We gathered up all the money we were given for Christmas (thanks, Mom!) and deposited it, so at least we're not in the red. But I have no idea at all what we are going to do for food and gasoline for almost 2 weeks.

February is going to be even worse. In February, our property taxes (of $1000) come due. We also have several other major expenses that put our budget out of whack by more than $2500. I can't wait to see what God does to rescue us from this annual pit. Yeah, sure, it'd be real good to set money aside all year for the February pit, wouldn't it? Sure, if there were no such thing as car breakdowns, sudden medical costs, and the like.

I've asked for all the hours I can work, which means bad food, unattended kids (no, not really, we both work at home so they aren't unattended, just not as attended as they usually are) and stress. Yuck. But I'm thankful for the hours that will bring in a teensy bit of money. It's not enough for groceries even (nope, not even beans and rice three meals a day) but it's something.

Then there's chicken pox. When the Christmas break was over and the public school kids were ready to go back, we had a snow "storm" (half an inch) that cancelled school for three days. My two youngest got to play with a friend they haven't seen in a year. She's just been through a divorce and there's no time for friends anymore. Three days later, we get a call: she's got chicken pox and my girls have been exposed. Oh, and the little girl had been immunized, so we have a 50/50 chance that the variation we have is beyond our immunity.

Back in October, my mother in law and I began planning a big surprise birthday party for hubby. He turns 50 this year and LOVES parties. This would be his first since our marriage. Of course, with a pending plague in the house, we had to cancel the party. And the plane tickets his brothers bought to fly out. And his mother's plans. And, and, and...

Oy.

I've been kind of low the last couple weeks. I'm sure glad it costs nothing to lay in bed because that's just about all I'm interested in doing right now.

Figures.

We got a note that our health insurance has been cancelled. The Lord took good care of us, 20 months without paying for insurance that we were covered due to "admin error." And other than a few prescriptions, we haven't needed it. But, the error has been found and corrected so we are now on our own.

The most expensive prescription is hubby's sleeping pills. He thinks he can switch to generic, which will save us some money over the $500 retail price.

But I've broken my foot.

It's not awful, at first I thought it was just a broken toe, which doctors can do nothing for. I know this because I've broken my toes a LOT in my life. This time the bruising and swelling are not just on the toe, but the top of my foot all the way to the ankle and the sole of my foot, too. It's been five days and it hurts almost as much as that first day when I step on it. The house is a mess, the chores are not getting done (because no one is checking them) and I'm getting really antsy.

Where I came from:

Where I am now:

/whine

Whew, that was a long climb...

It's been a long climb back up out of the pit I fell into. But I'm back-ish. Blair is home, summer is over, the new school year is well under way, the Thanksgiving bird is eaten and Christmas is approaching much, much faster than I had hoped.

Part of what's been keeping me so busy is my new blog: Local Nourishment. I'll link to it from here, but I won't link back from there to here. Too much personal info here for the general audience I'm hooked up with over there. It kinda grew out of a dietary experiment and has become a fascinating, educating thing.

So, let's see. Where did I leave off? Goodness, but the finances were miserable there for a while! Still no regular "job", and none on the horizon, but we're still hanging in there. Hubby actually just signed a contract with Apologia (you might know them from their amazingly excellent science curriculum.) We finished book one of hubby's worldview series:

and we've started working on book 2. Here's a link to a much better picture and description. It was a lot like being pregnant. Exhaustion, swollen ankles, nausea, headaches, followed by several months of waiting, a final push and an exciting delivery. But, UPS brought this one, not the stork.

That's the biggest news.

When Life Gets Tough, Act Like a Cavy

Cavies are really smart. They eat lots and lots of roughage, some leafy greens every day and occasionally a piece of fruit for a sweet treat. They drink only water, no soda or juices and take a bath after eating. When they are happy, they just randomly leap into the air and twist around midflight. Several times a day they tear through their cage at top speed for several minutes. When they get sleepy, they find a soft, warm spot and curl up for a nap.

My life would be much better if I followed those simple rules.

Naptime!

Please forgive my long absence. I have been much employed elsewhere.

Like for example, we discovered mold in the girls' basement room and I am throwing my hands up in despair. We are all horribly allergic, but can't afford to get it fixed. Rose is all broken out again. I've moved her upstairs to sleep, but the spores are in the air and she's not improving. I'm hacking and coughing like a tuberculosis patient and we are all having headaches. Sometimes I wish a tornado would just blow this stupid house away so we could start over.

The garage I worked so hard to unpack, clean and repack has been attacked by kids and is now a bigger mess than it ever was.

Our "brand new" (used, but new to us) car is having brake problems.

Blair is doing well in CO and I've grown into a quiet missing instead of an acute pain.

The youngest two are complaining about the lack of schooling we do. What part of unschooling don't they understand? They're asking for book reports, spelling tests and the like. I know it's a transitory phase, but I'd really like to oblige.

Hubby's insomnia keeps me up until midnight, and wakes me frequently during the tiny hours. John's breakfast must be cooked at 5:30AM and I rarely go back to bed at that point. I'm getting a good, solid three hours of sleep a night, and have been taking long expanses of naps in the afternoon. It's still not enough and I'm incoherent most of the day. I'd like to just sleep all the time and escape all the dreck in my life.

There's so much I need to be doing right now and I just want to sleep.

She's leaving home

Blair is leaving us. April 29th. Just a month before her 19th birthday.

She is going to Colorado to live with a married friend and help take care of the friend's two little ones for the summer. In return, the friend is going to help her get a part-time job and allow her enough time to hone her writing skills. Blair has a lot of friends in the Denver/Colorado Springs area. The friend is a woman we trust. She's stayed with us at our home, and we know her pastor. I guess it's a good thing.

But I know Blair. She won't be back. She'll fall in love with Colorado, just like I did and that will be that. I could be a lot more upset, but I think she'll do fine. She's a smart girl with a good head on her shoulders, and what I can't teach her here she will learn on her own. I'm relieved she has a friend to stay with and she's not all alone out there.

It wasn't easy to let my oldest go, but he was ready to be on his own. I've had ten years to feather my nest for my little birdies. But with Blair's departure, I know the next ten years will be full of leavings. See, my oldest is 10 years older than Blair, and Blair is 10 years older than my youngest. I guess, rather like the discovery of a whole crop of gray hair, this is kind of a turning point in my life. My days as a mommy are very quickly coming to a close.

Ouch.

It was hard for me to come to grips with no longer being of child bearing age, but I did it. I walked through it and am comfortable, finally, on the other side. I have a feeling it will be a little tougher than that to see them leave home.

Ouch.

The selfish part of me wants to make her stay. Whatever will life be like without her? I can't imagine. But I know it's time.

Ouch.

I think I'm gonna cry a little now.